Find Useful Tips about Relationships Between Mothers and Daughters
The relations between mothers and daughters are a very delicate issue, and a serious problem in many families. It seems that it is natural that such relations are harmonious and smooth, but unfortunately this is not true for many mothers and daughters. Sometimes these two closest people live their lives in constant arguments and misunderstandings, and only after a lot of time passes they look back and realise that they have wasted all their lives for some minor clashes of opinions, but no one of them wants to make the first step towards the other.
All these problems are the result of lack of understanding. Or, it is better to say – lack of willingness to understand. If mother and daughter have arguments than both are wrong. Mother says “You will understand me when you will become a mother”, and daughter says “You will understand me if you recall your own youth”. Basically, both of them are right.
Any mother wants to see her daughter grow up beautiful, healthy, successful, rich, and happy; any mother wants her daughter to possess the traits and the things that she herself lacks. This is good to some extent, but sometimes it merges with madness, particularly if a mother wants her daughter to blindly follow her will and gain a certain profession without taking into account the daughter’s will. It is good if the daughter is strong enough to resist this pressure and do as she likes, but if not, her destiny is likely to be broken for ever. Mothers, daughters, do you recognize yourself in these words?
The thing is that all the misunderstandings of mother and daughter lead to only one set of consequences – stress, depression, fear, uncertainty, offence, and desire to escape. Both women are in a useless competition where there are no winners – each one is a loser.
It is easy to advise to listen to each other and understand each other more. This is the same as to advise not to have problems. The problems have to be eliminated in root, and the best way is just to talk. Even if you don’t speak with each other, even if you have no desire, and however unusual and weird it is – you have to try. From the very beginning of your conversation make a deal that you won’t interrupt each other. Let each of you speak your mind and everything that you don’t like in your relationship. Try to make the other understand you, and do your best to understand the other in your turn. Speak about the things you will not do from now on. After this try to be loving and caring in order to avoid further tensity in relationship.
In some cases the characters of mother and daughter are so incompatible that they can’t live together at all. In this case you had better live in different places, especially if the daughter is grown-up. Sometimes it is better to preserve distant peace than to destroy everything that is left in the short distance.
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