Domestic violence is a serious charge. If you have been charged with domestic violence because you turned on your spouse in anger, you need to take two steps immediately. Your first action must be to retain a Las Vegas domestic violence attorney. This action is vital to your future whenever any type of criminal charge has been made against you, but it is especially vital in the case of domestic abuse. If you love your spouse and want to rescue the marriage, you need a Las Vegas domestic abuse attorney to minimize and mitigate the life-changing effects of a single incident. The second action needed to preserve the relationship is to see a counselor or therapist for anger-management training.

Retaining a competent lawyer that specializes in domestic violence cases is important because the issue is so serious. All possible actions must be taken immediately to stop further abuse from occurring. In many parts of the country, Nevada being one, domestic violence is an enhancement crime. This term means that, after each conviction, the penalties become much more severe. Besides stricter penalties, you may lose your Second Amendment right to own a firearm. Also, if child custody becomes an issue, a conviction for domestic abuse can prevent you from being given even partial custody of your children.

While assistance from a domestic violence attorney is vital to you now when a charge has been filed, counseling and anger-management training is needed to prepare for the future. If you want to save your current relationship or have a chance for a successful future relationship, you need to learn to express your anger in healthy and loving ways. While online anger-management training is available, it can be most successful with the assistance of a counselor or therapist in live sessions.

Dr. Tony Fiore and Dr. Ari Novick have published a book called Anger Management for the 21st Century. In this book, Drs. Fiore and Novick give eight techniques to help you to take control of your anger. These techniques can be summarized into one concept, which is to think before you react. These techniques can be summarized thusly:

1. Recognize stress. A lot of anger is caused by stress. If you learn to recognize that you are experiencing stress, you can use various stress-reducing techniques during times when you are feeling no anger.

2. Develop empathy. An empathic person can feel and thus understand the feelings of others.

3. Respond instead of react. Reacting implies acting without thinking. When you feel angry, don’t let your first reaction come out without thinking it through first.

4. Change the conversation with yourself. In your self-talk, analyze how you react to anger and why you hold onto it.

5. Communicate assertively. When you communicate assertively, you stick up for your beliefs and for yourself without being aggressive or hostile.

6. Adjust expectations. Nobody’s perfect. Figure out what you can accept in your family without expecting perfection.

7. Forgive, but don’t forget. Don’t let resentment build up over past actions. Become a forgiving person.

8. Retreat and think things over. Before you react with violence, step away and think things through so that you can respond and not react.

This entry was posted on Thursday, April 16th, 2009 at 2:07 am and is filed under Parenting Help. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.